Forward is the Only Direction to Go
I had decided I had to quit looking in the review mirror and face it head on. Of course my feelings started to rise back up, the skeleton started to come out after 28 years of being in the closet.
I am a mother of four children, two handsome sons and two beautiful daughters. A grandmother of three handsome boys and one diva granddaughter. I was sexually abused. I would pray that one-day God would give me the strength to get out.
I had very low self-esteem of myself. I finally decided that I needed to curl-up and die or get up and fight. I made the decision to fight, and make a better life for my 3 children. Because this was not the life I wanted for me or for them to see.
I knew then that I could only cry out to my God to give me the strength, wisdom, knowledge & understanding on how to be the best single mom I could be to protect my children from harm and give them a better life than I had.
My favorite scripture is Philippians 3:14 “I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God.” So every time I get discouraged or feel like I couldn’t go on, or I am not good enough I just refresh my memory of this scripture. Know that God holds the key to my future and my children’s future. I know that what I went through was not right and I didn’t deserve it but because of it I am the Woman I am today. It only made me stronger and better not bitter.
I am thankful for the Saprea Retreat. It made me realize that it’s okay to talk about it, to get counseling if needed.